polysymphonic:

plsdonttakemyadvice:

Man human imprinting is crazy. My friend’s roomba zoomed by me and I got this intense urge to reach down and pat it. Like it’s just a machine? But it’s a good boy? It spends all day cleaning and sleeping and exploring the house and never complains and it’s just so good little robot? Pet robot?? Pet the robot????? Why am I like this???

When I bought my roomba the lady at the store told me that if it breaks within warranty and I send it back to the manufacturer, I can request that they fix and send back the same roomba instead of just sending back a new one. I gave her a confused look and she explained that people get attached to Their Roomba and don’t want them to just be replaced because they’re like part of the family. Humans are pretty great.

(via 0utbox)

z-a-n-o-s:

fukkce:

your speed doesn’t matter, forward is forward

(via 0utbox)

hatefuhk:

when people ask where you see yourself in 10 years

(via deathbycuteboy)

otterandterrier:

I’m just a dumb bitch… standing in front of a romcom… asking it to fill the void in my life with somewhat unattainable representations of romantic love

(via bob-belcher)

trashboat:

trashboat:

trashboat:

moment of genuine kinship with the man who noticed me applying lip chap while bagging my groceries as he took out his lip chap and applied as he walked by

truly the most genuine moment of compassion with a strange man has been when he met my eyes and motioned his lip chap in a cheers motion. forever my brother in arms

think i might be lonely

(via guy)

tandembicycles:

greedtheavariciouslygay:

somecunttookmyurl:

tandembicycles:

somecunttookmyurl:

tandembicycles:

what if we called “flat” soda “flaccid” soda instead

hey, tandem?

I’m out for the evening

ok i’ll wait

Tandem, come home and face the horror you’ve created

no

(via dulect)

novitiate2017:

Bottom left stovetop burner stans make some noise

(via deathbycuteboy)

sonypraystation:

slavery:

is it beef?

(via bitchvirgo)